Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Viva Las Vegas - by Daddy J



So it turns out Vegas is the perfect destination for the travel snob. Who knew? You'da thunk that the tacky replicas of the world's wonders would repel the seasoned Grand Tourist, but no. Instead they work like a sort of traveller's IQ test. While others gawp at a vague Parisian theme, your intellectual snob can knowingly clock the mini Musee D'Orsay. Ah yes, he says, the Doge's Palace, I remember it well.

Better than that it turns out the ersatz versions are even better than the real thing. The walk from the Arc de Triomphe to the Eiffel Tower is a mere 50 metres. The Venetian canals smell of cinnamon. And the toilets in Paris are clean and spacious and have seats. More than that, they are hilarious - hidden speakers pipe classic chat up lines ("Is that an eclair in your pocket?; If you were a McDonald's sandwich you'd be a McSexy!") and their French translations. Beat that po-faced Parisians! America rules!

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